Monday, February 28, 2011

Day 12: Joy in the sacred

How do I put this as simply as possible?  I love being Catholic.  Serious Catholic.  Daily Mass-attending Catholic.  Fit-in-more-with-old-ladies-than-with-my-peers Catholic.

How do I put this without sounding prideful, holier-than-thou, or as though I'm getting ahead of myself?  I want to be a Dominican sister.  To fill myself with Him daily so that I can empty myself out to others in service of Him.

This morning I went to Mass at St. John's (home), then stayed for the rosary.  If only I had no obligations but to grow in the love of Christ.  I'm sorry, Jesus -- it's hard for me to see the meaning behind Your plan for me here at college.  I just want to give up all in pursuit of You!  Not that I'm dreading FOCUS, since I know it will change me entirely and help me be holy, but it makes my heart a little sad to know that I have to wait two years before I can actively discern.  Of course this is providential, since I may even discover a call to the married life while I'm a missionary, but at the moment it's a little difficult to accept.

O Lord, give me strength to persevere in these last few months!  Holy Spirit, fill me with courage.

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